The first semester of college, I hung out with my roommates/suite mates all the time and I still do, the only problem is that I sense some “bad blood” and quite frankly, I am getting fed up with a few things. I have decided to room with my friend who lives across the hall, and also with the same suite mates that I have now, and I do not know how it is going to work out. This semester has been a very stressful semester. All the homework assignments and the tests just seem to never stop coming and I think that everyone needs a break. I am wondering if this is what is making the dorm life a little different this semester. I am a pretty passive person and I tend to let a lot of things slide, and I think that I am a pretty reasonable person, but it seems I have been getting a little more vocal when expressing things to my roommates/suite mates. This might be a cause to some of the problems, and I really do not know if rooming with them is such a good idea anymore. I really want to get everything out in the open so everyone in my room knows where they all stand so it will be possible to continue to live peacefully. The only problem is that I don’t really know what to do because I normally do not like to speak about topics like this. I mean who wants to tell people there problems with each other? I know a lot of people first semester had roommate/suitemate problems, and I was wondering what some possibilities would be. Should I continue to let things slide, or should I start to call out people on certain undesirable things, or is there a better way to go about this whole little predicament?
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I know exactly how you feel!! Though I must say that my roommate/suitemate problems began much sooner than the beginning of this semester. I think we began having problems by the second week of school. I think our problem is that we are all three just so different; though out of us I am the odd one out. Mostly because I am like you, I don’t like confrontation on any level and I really don’t like getting mad at someone. So for the first few months I just got walked all over, and when I finally got sick of it, I just stopped talking to them.
ReplyDeleteMy roommate is the biggest problem, and I think that’s what you said too. Suitemates are much easier to get along with because you’re not living in the same room. I get along with mine much more than my roommate, (even though she is caddy and does things like put hair on my toothbrush).
I didn’t apply for a room switch because I like my dorm and I like my room and I really didn’t want to have to move, so I understand what its like to just "put up" with your living situation. The way I get through it is by remembering that its only a few more weeks and I would rather just not really talk to my roommate and leave it at that then confront her and have her be mad and mean for the rest of the year.
I'm sorry that you’re going through this to; I know how much it sucks.
You have to call out exactly what the problems are. I don't think you should just keep quiet and let the problems pass by. Even though it's almost the end of the semester this can apply to any area of your life. It's never good to just keep quiet and have a dissatisfying time in whatever your doing. I'm pretty sure we've all had some roommate/suitemate problems once in a while and the way I have dealt with it is by simply calling them out. I never do this in a bad way I just come up to them and tell them exactly what I think the problems are and what I think should be done about it. Every time time I have done this it has actually worked. Even though you think you aren't doing anything wrong you have to be able to accept whatever problems they think you are causing as well. If everything works out I think you should continue to room with your friend because you have probably lived together for a while now and a sort of trust has probably been established. Good luck in whatever you do and remember, don't keep quiet!
ReplyDeleteI am a very passive person too. I had some small issues here and there with my roommate, but the truth is that by now they have REALLY added up. I think having this one year of dealing with another person and having them maybe have to "deal with" you was a good learning experience. I learned that not everyone can be reasonable all the time and I learned just how different people can be in so many different aspects. However, most importantly I learned to never go pot-luck on a roommate again haha!
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